Friday, July 11, 2008

TOWER OF BABBLE


Removing useless chatter from my head and dumping it all in yours:

Every week, there’s a new rumor of an NFL franchise moving to Los Angeles. At this rate, by March, the City of Angels will be hosting 32 NFL teams.

Speaking of rumors, I’m tired of hearing about Green Bay's retiree planning a comeback. If I announced that Jesus Christ returned today, fan reaction would be, “yeah, but what’s the latest on Brett Favre?”

Nadal is rising, and Federer is sliding, and I really don’t care that much. My heart still misses Anna Kournikova and the loser that she was.

A survey revealed that NFL coaches still don’t want Terrell Owens on their roster, but I’m sure they don’t want him on opposing rosters either. Where’s that survey? I’m going to go out on a limb and say Wade Phillips voted “yes”.

The Arkansas Razorbacks are considering pay-per-view offers for their football fans. McFadden and Jones are gone, so who’s going to pay to see that sh*t?

A survey of college football fans concludes that East or West, the coach of USC is among the most hated in the country. It was Pete Carroll for the Western USC, and Steve Spurrier for the East. It actually said “any program coached by Spurrier”, but since he’s at South Carolina, the hate is currently pinned to them.

Programs are jumping up to schedule the Fighting Irish in the future. It’s as if they see an opportunity to finally kick the neighborhood bully’s ass.

I saw a list of the “dirtiest players in the NFL”, and not a single Denver offensive lineman was named. Oddly enough, I also saw a list of the “NFL’s smartest players”, and they should have made that list, just for allowing voters to overlook their cheating ways on the list prior.

Speaking of the Donks, I’m thoroughly convinced that if Brandon Marshall hired a chauffeur, he’d still be ticketed for J-walking next week.

Kevin Jones needs to find a gig, before LaMont Jordan goes on tour.

Elton Brand will participate in the 2009 NBA playoffs. Baron Davis will watch them from his living room.

In my best spiritual voice, “cleansing yourself and removing the devil will move you closer to heavenly rewards.” Just ask the Rays.

The mind is a sponge, soaking up knowledge, but sometimes it needs a squeeze.

Fight On!

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