Football Factories: The 33rd Team of the NFL

I recently viewed the NFL Network’s “top 10 list”, and the subject was “NFL football factories”. And though I had no doubt that the Trojans would top the list, some of the choices or positions in the order were debatable. The list is based on the all time production of programs, when it comes to generating NFL talent. Here’s the list, along with their resumes and my own commentary on each. At first glance, you may see something noticeably missing. This list from the NFL Network doesn’t include a single Big 12 program.

1. Southern California Trojans

With 11 NFL Hall of fame inductees, and 59 Trojans making 201 Pro Bowl appearances, USC is placed above all others in terms of NFL production. If we’re ranking programs based on their talent levels, there’s no greater measure than reaching the NFL’s highest plateaus. Trojan players have made 97 Superbowl appearances, with WR Steve Smith being the most recent to wear a championship ring. In 41 Superbowls, a Trojan has appeared in all but 3, which supports the old adage that if you want to be an NFL champion, you increase the odds with a Trojan on your roster. If Smith’s Giants would have failed in their upset bid, another Trojan, Junior Seau of the Patriots, would have earned his first Superbowl ring.

Aside from spitting out players, this factory also produces coaches. Current NFL coaches from USC include Lane Kiffin (Raiders), Jack Del Rio (Jaguars), Norv Turner (Chargers), Jeff Fisher (Titans), Rod Marinelli (Lions), and Mike Holmgren (Seahawks). Former NFL coaches are Joe Gibbs, Steve Mariucci, John Robinson, John McKay, Wayne Fontes, and of course, Pete Carroll.

2. Miami Hurricanes

If this list was limited to modern football factories, the U would occupy the top spot. Even sitting in the second position is questionable, with their span of excellence only extending 25 years. But without a doubt, the Canes have more impact on today’s NFL playing fields than any other college program.

Miami has produced Jeremy Shockey, Kellen Winslow Jr., Michael Irvin, Clinton Portis, Willis McGahee, Frank Gore, Jonathan Vilma, Warren Sapp, Ray Lewis, Devin Hester, Sean Taylor, Jim Kelly, Bernie Kosar, Vinnie Testeverde, Andre Johnson, and Antrelle Rolle, just to name a few. They produced 19 first round picks in a 4 year span, which stands as a record. In the past 20 years, no school has sent more players to the NFL than the Miami Hurricanes (136).

3. Notre Dame Fighting Irish

Here come the Irish, but they should have already arrived. Realistically, if you’re not going to punish the Canes for arriving late, how can you punish the Irish for building their factory early? The Irish have 10 members of the Pro Football Hall of fame, compared to Miami’s 4. Notre Dame had 461 players drafted. Miami had 293. Giving a fair assessment, based on “all time factories”, Miami isn’t even in the same ballpark as Notre Dame.

Notre Dame’s production includes Joe Montana, Joe Theisman, Tim Brown, Rocket Ismail, Jerome Bettis, Julius Jones, Bob Golic, Dave Casper, Chris Zorich, Ryan Grant, Justin Tuck, and Reynaldo Wynn. Montana and Theisman combine for 5 Superbowl victories by Irish quarterbacks.

4. Ohio State Buckeyes

If you want to erase the Big 10 and Ohio State “lack of speed” myths, then all it takes is some name dropping. Tedd Ginn Jr., Cris Carter, Joey Galloway, Santonio Holmes, Anthony Gonzalez, and Terry Glenn are all Buckeyes. THE Ohio State has produced 53 NFL pro bowl players. 7 Heisman Trophies have been won by 6 players. Other notable NFL names include Eddie George, Mike Vrabel, A.J. Hawke, Orlando Pace, Chris Spielman, Shawn Springs, Paul Warfield, and Jim Marshall. What’s obviously missing from the list of Buckeyes is a great quarterback. In terms of quarterback production, OSU is nowhere near a factory, but manages to fill all other positions in the sport.

5. Michigan Wolverines

Here’s something we’ve become familiar with over the years, “The wolverines trail the Buckeyes”. The NFL Network’s number four and five teams are actually interchangeable, and you probably wouldn’t get an argument from anyone outside of the states of Michigan and Ohio.

The Wolverines have produced 7 Hall of Famers, and 36 Pro Bowlers. Braylon Edwards, Ty Law, Brian Griese, Dan Dierdoff, Desmond Howard, Anthony Carter, Todd Collins, Steve Hutchinson, Marlin Jackson, Cato June, Amani Toomer, Chris Perry, Jon Runyan, LaMarr Woodley, Charles Woodson, and Mr. Tom Brady are all U of M alum.

6. Alabama Crimson Tide

Montana and Theisman may have given Notre Dame 5 superbowl rings, but the Alabama Crimson tide boasts 3 quarterbacks, Bart Starr, Ken Stabler, and Joe Namath, that have led their NFL teams to championship victory. With 6 Hall of Fame inductess, the Network rated the Tide as the top football factory in the SEC.

7. Penn State Nittany Lions

Penn State is the third Big 10 program to make this list, giving the conference the most representatives of all conferences. Credit Joe Paterno for his ability to consistently recruit NFL caliber talent throughout the years. The count is 5 Hall of Famers and 34 pro bowl players for the Nittany Lions.

8. Syracuse Orange

Syracuse? The Orange never struck me as a football factory, despite their production of Jim Brown and Ernie Davis. Marvin Harrison, Daryl Johnston, Donovan McNabb, Art Monk, Larry Csonka, David Tyree, Keith Bullock, Dwight Freeney and John Mackey are also Syracuse products. And in case you’re reading this and scratching your head, consider that the Orange’s 6 Hall of Fame members are more than Texas, OU, and Florida State combined.

9. The Mid-American Conference

This is by far their worst choice, because it’s totally unfair. You can’t pit an entire conference against individual programs. Where would the MAC rank, if matched against other conferences?

The conference produced Randy Moss, Chad Pennington, Ben Roethlisberger, Byron Lefwich, Antonio Gates, Jason Taylor, Jack Lambert, Chester Taylor, and Josh Cribbs. But if you compare rosters to those of other conferences, the MAC would severely slump in numbers. Bad choice.

10. Tennessee Volunteers.

With 37 Pro Bowl players and 2 Hall of Famers, the Vols secured the final spot on the list. Peyton Manning and Reggie White may be the biggest Tennessee headliners, but other names of note are Jason Witten, Bill Bates, Albert Haynesworth, Travis Henry, Carl Pickens, Jamal Lewis, Eric Parker, Peerless Price, Jack “hacksaw” Reynolds, Heath Shuler, Donte’ Stallworth, Al Wilson, and Gibril Wilson.

Eyes On A Foe: Horton Hears A Hoo

My countdown clock has reached 58 days, and Horton hears a Hoo. Or maybe it should be “Horton heard a Hoo”? When USC gave the announcement that the Virginia Cavaliers were added to the 2008 football schedule, there was coast to coast excitement that was nearly deafening. But here we are in July, just 58 days before kickoff, and the clash is drawing silence. The Hoos are being hurdled, as anticipation builds for the following opponent, the Ohio State Buckeyes.

I’ll credit a big part of the reduction in hype to the Virginia loss of personnel, but the media plays its role in reducing the enthusiasm for what was once slated as a battle of two coastal programs with BCS popularity. The Sporting News, Lindy, Athlon, Phil Steele, etc, have written the Hoos off, giving them absolutely no chance at pulling out this victory. At this rate, the Trojans may enter that August game as a 4 touchdown favorite.

Virginia finished 9-4 last season, but very few are projecting them to finish any higher than 5th in the ACC. Phil Steele took it to another extreme, placing the Hoos last in the Coastal division. In case you don’t know, last place in the Coastal division puts you below Duke. Duke managed just one victory in 2007.

As for the rankings, USC is projected top 5 of the preseason polls, while Virginia is being ranked in the 60s. The numbers alone will quell the excitement. But here’s to hoping the men of Troy don’t get caught in the media frenzy, because they’ve been here before. Walking in as a 4 touchdown favorite, pales in comparison to the nearly 7 touchdowns Vegas gave them against Stanford. Yes. That memory is still fresh, and just as bitter today, as it was nearly a year ago.

Fight On!

DOH-mer Of The Week- Justice or Just-us?

Let’s give a shout out to Judge Thomas Gagola. And instead of leaving you sitting there thinking, “who the f**k is that”, I’ll give you a description. As last seen, Judge Gagola was on his knees, with lips puckered and planted firmly on the a$$ cheeks of Bills’ running back Marshawn Lynch. Gagola, my Doh-mer, gave even more proof that our court systems function with favoritism, and they’ll bend to give a smooch to the buttocks of a star, but when it comes to the average man, they bend us over.

Everyone is well aware that Marshawn Lynch went to court to face charges for a hit-and-run accident. From the moment of the occurrence, there was the anticipation of an outcome. Well, that outcome has come and gone. And in the end, Lynch’s wallet is $150 lighter and his license (that he only had for one day) is suspended. And no, I didn’t leave any zeros off the posted amount.

I’ve had speeding tickets more costly, and hit nothing but the gas. $150 wouldn’t cover the transport fee for the woman struck in the street by Lynch, assuming paramedics took her to the hospital. The woman suffered a bruised hip and required 7 stitches to close a wound. Anyone that’s ever been to a hospital emergency room knows that stitches are going for at least $250 each. This woman took the brunt of the punishment, with Lynch receiving none. I can't blame Lynch for that, even though he's a Golden Bear, and I'd really love to.

Lynch claimed he saw the woman, but never realized he struck her. He was said to react with a state of shock, when told that there are no speed bumps in the area he was driving. And in my defense of Mr. Lynch, it’s apparent that the noticeable damage to his vehicle, resulting from the incident, doesn’t signal that he hit someone, but says that maybe she hit him….... Okay, poor defense, but I tried.

When a person is stopped and blows a .08 in a breathalyzer, they’re cited for drunk driving. I don’t know about the rest of the country, but that’s an expensive citation in my parts. You begin with court fees, court ordered substance abuse classes (at your expense), license suspension, and any possible attorney fees. In the end, that .08 may cost you thousands of dollars, and you didn’t hit anyone.

The message is pretty clear, as laid down by Judge Doh-mer and the NY state courts. If you are driving reckless, and you strike someone, don’t stop and check on your victim. Drive your stupid a$$ home, park in the driveway, and wait for the police to come to you. That’s only 150 bucks! If you were drunk, wait at least 4 days ,as Lynch did (not that he was drunk, but just saying), before making a formal appearance and giving a response to the accident. Do you think that would work for you? What's your time in the 40 yard dash?

There’s celebrity justice, and then there’s just-us. The gap between them is greater than the space separating talent between Bills and Patriots. Supposedly, Sheriff Goodell is going to look into the incident, but what the f**k for? A $150 fine? What would the NFL punishment be for a fine so small? Destroying the tapes?

So, in closing, if you happen to catch a Bills game this season, and you see that robed object Marshawn Lynch is dragging behind on the field. Just know that it’s my Doh-mer, with his lips still fully attached.

Off Topic: Sapp providing points in the Gruden debate

From the moment the Tampa Bay Buccaneers defeated the Oakland Raiders in Superbowl XXXVII, some friends and I followed with a debate over John Gruden and Tony Dungy. Dungy was fired and replaced with Gruden, which cost the Bucs first and second round picks in ’03 and ’04, along with a cash amount of $8 million. And though the Bucs seemed to immediately profit from the acquisition, I always viewed it as an optical illusion. The question for the debate was simple. Who is the real genius behind the Buccaneers championship team, Dungy or Gruden?

It has always been my opinion that Gruden jumped aboard a fast moving train, riding it to become the NFL’s youngest coach to reach the supreme destination. Others argued that Dungy was a perennial underachiever, and had he remained at the helm, the Bucs would never have a taste of champagne. We see now that they were wrong about Dungy, who has since retooled another NFL franchise, and wears a Superbowl championship ring, just like Gruden. The difference is, his Indianapolis Colts are stabilized, and remain one of the NFL elite, where Gruden’s Superbowl champions took an immediate plunge before working their way back to some respectability in 2007, which I credit to a weak NFC Southern Division.

Looking at the 2002 season, you’ll either see “Gruden the Great” or “Gruden the Bust”, depending on which team your focus is on. Looking at his Bucs, he resembles greatness, leading them to glory. But looking at the team left behind, the Oakland Raiders, you’ll see a bust, because Bill Callahan was able to step in as their first year coach and drive them into that championship game, something Gruden never accomplished in silver and black.

It’s easy to form opinions as a fan, blogger, or member of the media, but how much weight does the opinion of a player hold? I would say it holds more weight than all others. In a recent question and answers session with the San Francisco Chronicle, newly retired Raider and former Buccaneer, Warren Sapp, touched on this very debate. When asked who is most deserving of the credit for Tampa Bay’s Superbowl victory, Dungy or Gruden, Sapp responded with:

"I always say this: The damn cake was already in the oven. It was just a matter of when it came out. All Jon had to do was put the icing on it."

His answer appears more supportive of my theory, and I’ll gladly take the points. Icing the cake is the easiest part of the process, where it’s more time consuming and requires more skill to gather the ingredients, estimate the correct portions, and determine the temperature for baking. Dungy baked another cake in Indy, but this time he iced it himself. On the other hand, Gruden doesn’t appear to be a baker, and his product continues to collapse in the middle.

Beginning with 2002, the records of the two coaches reflect as follows:

Gruden’s Bucs

2002- 12-4*
2003- 7-9
2004- 5-11
2005- 11-5
2006- 4-12
2007- 9-7

Total- 48-48

Dungy’s Colts

2002- 10-6
2003- 12-4
2004- 12-4
2005- 14-2
2006- 12-4*
2007- 13-3

Totals- 73-23
*Superbowl championship year

It’s no contest. And if I were a Tampa Bay fan, I’d be begging for Dungy’s return. Both coaches only have one championship ring, but keep in mind that Dungy ran into a playoff wrecking ball named the Patriots 3 times, managing to defeat them just once. It was also that Patriots wrecking ball that kept Gruden's best Raiders team from reaching the Superbowl. And seeing that Gruden once worked as a part time caddy for the PGA’s John Daly, he was already prepared to celebrate another’s victories, when he did nothing but hold the bag.